Some relationships make you feel great, while others wipe you out. Judith Orloff shows you how to identify and minimize the effects of the energy vampires in your life.
Relationships are always an energy exchange. To stay feeling our best, we must ask ourselves, 'Who gives us energy? Who saps it?' It's important to be surrounded by supportive, heart-centered people who make us feel safe and secure. It's equally important to pinpoint the energy vampires, who, whether they intend to or not, leech our energy.
Positive energy in others can be rejuvenative. For instance, you're nervous about a job interview, but the minute you meet your prospective boss you relax. He's so calm and welcoming, you calm down, too. Or perhaps you have a good friend around whom you always feel loved. These are energy-givers, those we must gravitate toward.
In contrast, energy vampires exude negative energy that drains. Vampires range from the intentionally malicious ones to those who are oblivious to their effect. Some are overbearing and obnoxious; others are friendly and charming. For example, you're at a party talking to a perfectly nice person, but suddenly you're nauseous or weak. Or how about the coworker who drones on about how she broke up with her boyfriend for the tenth time? Eventually, she feels better, but you're spent. The bottom line is that on a subtle energy level these people suck you dry.
Take an inventory of people in your life who give energy, and people who drain. Specifically identify the energy vampires, and begin to evaluate ones you'd like to limit contact with or eliminate. Plan at least one complete afternoon with people who give off positive energy and avoid drainers. Notice how this beneficially affects your physical and emotional well-being.
Adapted from Emotional Freedom by Judith Orloff. Copyright © 2009 by Three Rivers Press.